I know that our goal as blogging Hipsters is to provide tips and hope for other aspiring hipsters but the sad truth is that no matter how many tips we provide you with, there will still be moments where you find yourself acting....for lack of a better term, hopelessly mainstream. But don't go throwing out your newly purchased Sufjan vinyls just yet, there is still hope! Hipster culture has a loophole that most are simply not indie fresh enough to take advantage of: the versatility of irony. Irony truly is the perfect Hipster scapegoat. As you know, hipsters as a whole are not the most forgiving when it comes to behaving out of character. However, with the right spin, you can go from being pathetically unhip to a god of counterculture.
Now, proper use of the word irony is one that often evades people, so if you're under the impression that coincidentally and ironically are interchangeable then just give up right now. There is no room for you in the Hipster community. However, if middle school grammatical lessons weren't completely wasted on you, then I invite you to read on.
I could ramble on for pages about the many ways that irony can save you from a potentially reputation ruining situation, but for simplicity sake I will provide you with a fictional example of how irony can get a Hipster out of the stickiest of situations:
A group of hipsters in a Williamsburg loft, chilling on floor pillows arranged in a triangular formation while smoking hand rolled cigarettes. One of the Hipsters is documenting the moment with his digital SLR. A MacBook, belonging to Hipster 3, sits in the center of the formation, blasting The Velvet Underground.
The playlist changes. The hipsters now find their indie fresh ears being tainted with the "musical" styling of Ke$ha. A look of sheer panic appears on the face of Hipster 3. Hipsters 1,2, and 4 immediately turn to Hipster 3, the looks on their faces demanding an explanation. The window of opportunity where Hipster 3 could have lunged at the computer to press pause has passed and the hipster now has to decide what excuse ze can use to get out of this situation.
Pause. This is a very delicate moment. Watch to see how the Hipster artfully uses irony to turn the situation around completely.
Now, proper use of the word irony is one that often evades people, so if you're under the impression that coincidentally and ironically are interchangeable then just give up right now. There is no room for you in the Hipster community. However, if middle school grammatical lessons weren't completely wasted on you, then I invite you to read on.
I could ramble on for pages about the many ways that irony can save you from a potentially reputation ruining situation, but for simplicity sake I will provide you with a fictional example of how irony can get a Hipster out of the stickiest of situations:
A group of hipsters in a Williamsburg loft, chilling on floor pillows arranged in a triangular formation while smoking hand rolled cigarettes. One of the Hipsters is documenting the moment with his digital SLR. A MacBook, belonging to Hipster 3, sits in the center of the formation, blasting The Velvet Underground.
Hipster 1
This moment reminds me so much of that one scene in On The Road....you know?
Hipster 2
Yeah, I can see what you mean, to an extent at least. Quite a brazen comparison to make.
Hipster 3
While the parallels are quite clear, I would argue that this moment is way more Ginsberg than anyone else.
Hipster 4
Wes Anderson, Sartre, The Decemberists.
The playlist changes. The hipsters now find their indie fresh ears being tainted with the "musical" styling of Ke$ha. A look of sheer panic appears on the face of Hipster 3. Hipsters 1,2, and 4 immediately turn to Hipster 3, the looks on their faces demanding an explanation. The window of opportunity where Hipster 3 could have lunged at the computer to press pause has passed and the hipster now has to decide what excuse ze can use to get out of this situation.
Pause. This is a very delicate moment. Watch to see how the Hipster artfully uses irony to turn the situation around completely.
Hipster 3
Your blatantly judgmental looks are wasted on me. Clearly you can't appreciate the irony in my choice of music. Tik Tok did not come on by any accident, I intentionally chose to play this because it is clearly ironic considering how counter-culture we are. I thought you guys were indie fresh enough to pick up on that. I was hoping we could critically analyze the song and examine the parallels between the lyrics and consumer America. Guess not though.
BAM. Hipsters 1, 2, and 4 are forever at the mercy of Hipster 3. Why? Because Hipster 3 is CLEARLY way cooler than any of them could ever aspire to be. Not picking up on irony is a big hipster no-no. The fact that Hipster 3 was successfully able to save his reputation while simultaneously knocking his fellow hipsters down a few peg definitely brought a smile to the face of the corpse of Buddy Holly. You go Hipster 3.
P.S. Why did I capitalize the H in 73% of the times I used the word "hipster?"
P.P.S. That was a rhetorical question, I don't know the answer to it.
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